It’s that time of year when we feel driven to reflect on the past and make resolutions for the new year. We all do that differently – maybe while we walk, or journal, or sip wine, or talk with family and friends. Or maybe while we work on a vision board. 

To some, all that “work” seems self-indulgent or maybe futile, but getting focused and intentional about goals and dreams is a well recognized and important part of any process improvement – whether you’re an artist, a corporate executive, or a caring parent. 

I used to roll my eyes at New Year’s Resolutions because I never got it right. 🙄 Year after year, I was beating myself up around mid-February as I realized that, once again, I hadn’t kept most of my resolutions. I grew weary of watching the “new me” slip into a “February fail.”

But about 7 or 8 years ago, I changed my process, and that changed me. 

Now, resolutions don’t defeat me. Instead, they keep me grounded in my values and more intentional as I continue to unfold and grow as a human (and a mom). 

What did I do differently? 

I switched the intent of my resolutions AWAY from fixing what I was doing wrong (or not doing right) and shifted my focus to creating a short list of resolutions that would create JOY, CONNECTION, and IMPACT.✨

Once I started doing that, I also noticed that several resolutions re-surfaced every year. It wasn’t because I didn’t stick with them and needed to try again, but it was more that they WORKED – and they improved my life. Now, I walk my dog. I meditate. I improved our dinner conversations. I make a point to attend live music performances. I volunteer. These resolutions became new habits which are now part of “who I am.” 

To give you another example, one of my recurring resolutions always involves my children (three daughters), and here it is:

I Resolve to PREPARE HER for what’s ahead.🔮

First, we have to get real about what’s ahead. If you’re not sure, ask parent of a child a little older than yours (and even if you think you know – ask anyway!). The things we need to prepare her for aren’t always easy to talk about, but preparation is critical for her confidence, her emotional well-being, her health, her relationships, her safety — and her joy.

You may have figured this out way faster than I did. I mean, you’ve already come to Girlology perhaps to do exactly that — preparing yourself to prepare her.

So, If you RESOLVE TO PREPARE HER, I can help make this resolution an easy one for you to keep. Just join the Girlology community and download the app. It will support you both wherever you go, whenever you need it. 

Schedule PREP TALKS regularly: friendships, puberty, skin care, period problems, mental health topics, healthy nutrition, sports, injuries — there are endless topics. Just pick some that might be on her horizon. 

Notice these things: the connection you are sharing; the impact it is making on her knowledge, wellness & confidence; and the JOY you feel when you see how this works. The more you use it, the more it will become habit, and part of who YOU are!

Cheers to raising prepared & confident girls! 🥂

Did you know Girlology has grade-by-grade video on demand playlists to support her and you through all things puberty and adolescence. Our doctor-moms cover topics like this and lots others! Learn More HERE. 

If you were to take a few minutes before bed every night for a week to ponder and write down “Three Good Things” from your day, research says you’d experience an increase in happiness, hope, and optimism. If you were to stick with it longer, you’d grow resilience and you might also boost your immune system. Sound too good to be true? Three Good Things is one of the most well-known and well-studied tools of positive psychology. 

Seems like we should get our kids on board with it, right? 

So I tried.

When my kids were still in elementary school, we would do something similar at the dinner table every evening. We started each dinner by asking each person tell three good things from their day. We could hardly keep each of our girls from interrupting each other with their joyous lists of daily highlights. 🤗

Then came adolescence, and suddenly, our happy habit was “stupid” or met with silent, squinty glares. 🙄

Our forced family happiness exercise was ruining our family dinners. 

You know what else ruins a family dinner? 

The natural conversations that flow when dinner starts off with sighs and eye rolls over a happiness exercise. Next thing you know, you’re bringing up bad grades, forgotten chores, dirty rooms, and screen time.

Who wants to sit at that table? 😠😫😔

Eventually, everyone will be looking for a way out, and it becomes way too easy to let them all skip the dinner table and eat on their own schedules.

So, if you have adolescents, it’s time to be more strategic about meal time as well as the moods they may bring to the table. To help, I have two very simple recommendations:  

1.) Make the dinner table a place where the adults are not allowed to make any negative comments or observations. If the kids bring up emotionally charged topics. This is your chance to practice the 5 tips we shared in our Girlology TV episode on puberty, moods & attitudes. Members can watch it HERE.

2). Make eating together a priority whenever you can, because shared mealtime PROTECTS our kids from many of the things we worry about. Like what? Depression, disordered eating, unhealthy risk taking and it BOOSTS a lot of qualities we hope for, like self esteem, vocabulary, and even academic performance. Members can learn more about the benefits of shared mealtimes in our tip, Family Meals are Good Medicine. Even a couple times a week helps, and the meal doesn’t always have to be dinner! 

What works for you and your kids at mealtimes? Let us know in the comments! 🍴🥗🍕🍛🧇

Did you know Girlology has grade-by-grade video on demand playlists to support her and you through all things puberty and adolescence. Our doctor-moms cover topics like this and lots others! Learn More HERE.