If you’re new to this journey, we recommend you start HERE.
Last week, we asked you to consider some “what if’s,” and I hope that didn’t set off negative thoughts. Personally, when I think about how my life may have been different had I not felt self-conscious or unhappy with my body, I get a bit frustrated – maybe at myself for letting that happen – maybe at societal pressures for making that happen. Either way, I have to extend some grace to myself.
It’s too easy to fall into a negative spiral. And that often seems like our default when we think about our body.
But here’s what we want you to know for sure.
When your thoughts, or “that voice” in your head is negative, mean, or critical…you can learn to quiet that bitch. Truly, you can gain control over her. It’s a well-established phenomenon used in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
But first, you have to notice her.
Sometimes she is so active being mean in our head, that we just keep plugging along while she’s bantering on about how horrible and inadequate we are… and we let her.
So this week, your task is to notice her, then quiet her.
We’re not going to be so unrealistic to tell you that you can stop her permanently. We know that’s impossible, but you CAN take away her power by recognizing that two things can exist at the same time.
Here’s how:
You can listen to the thought without fighting it (because energy feeds the voice), but don’t let it end there. Instead, add an “AND” after the thought, and make a more truthful, compassionate statement.
It’s like the improv technique of using “yes, and….”
- My legs look big in this… AND I’m really comfortable.
- Ugh, look at those dark circles under my eyes… AND I deserve to take a nap or get to bed earlier.
- I’m looking older AND I’m grateful to still be here!
- My hair is a mess AND I’m getting things done!
- I’m too short for this style AND it doesn’t matter – people love my creativity.
Coming up with compassionate statements about yourself can be challenging because we’re so conditioned to be kind to others, but not ourselves. This week – let’s work on changing that.
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Congratulations on taking this journey for yourself and for your daughter. To help her gain the skills and habits that will protect her relationship with her body, share our class for girls with her: How to Like Your Body, included with her Girlology membership or available to purchase HERE.
For the best experience on any device, get the Girlology App on google play or in the app store.
